I just need to get this off my chest and I hands up admit that some of my irrational mind translates these throw away remarks in a downright irrational negative way but sometimes people should THINK before they speak.
"OMG you have gained so much weight" Nobody wants to hear this.
"You don't LOOK like you have an eating disorder" Yeah because its a mental illness
"I know so & so and they have a problem whereas you... you look much healthier" Crazy I know but that just translates as fat to me. Sadly I do enough comparing on own and don't need other people to do it for me.
"Have you gained yet?" None of your god damn business
"Your face looks really puffy" Probably because I've been crying (again)! In my mind I just heard... "Your face got really fat"
In the gym... "Slacking off are you?" "Go a bit faster" "Work harder" k thanks for your input but my mind repeats these every minute of the day I don't need them vocalised.
A really irrational one on my behalf but "You look so WELL" just makes me feel like hell. Its a compliment but it stirs up so much in my mind its unreal.
Wearing your heart on your sleeve really does come at a price sometimes but I won't become glued to a heart rate monitor to count every bleeding calorie because of daft comments. Its just not worth it really is it...?
It's normal that it is hard to hear that...
ReplyDeleteI remember how hard that was.
Hang tight beautiful xxxx
I just want to give you a huge hug right now.
ReplyDeleteI've had every single one of those comments in one variation or another depending on my weight and injury status. People are ignorant fools sometimes and those that belittle your ED should think before opening their mouths. I wouldn't be surprised if they weren't just jealous of your athletic abilities and trying to undermine you.
It's always the 'you look well' remark that stings the hardest for some reason. I think it's because I want to yell 'but I don't FEEL well!' on the inside, and the idea that because I look all healthy on the outside I am automatically 'okay' psychologically when in reality I like my body to look weak and frail because internally I'm in so much pain.
Ignore those comments: the people that make them aren't worth your time.
*hugs*
xxx
Sigh. I KNOW.
ReplyDeleteSucks. *hugs*
One of the first days I was home from hospital I popped in to Tesco and was greeted with
ReplyDelete"My word you have put on a LOT of weight"
Nice.
I replied with "I almost didn't recognise you...you've AGED"
comments are so un-needed. Well is the one that gets me the most too, and well, the one I get the most right now
"I can't get over how well you look"...
really now..I can't get over how much I want to slap you silly.
Hm ranty.
Love you x
Ladies thank you so much for your wonderful lovely comments. Its good to know I'm not alone in feeling this way but frustrating that we have to feel like this. I love you all!
ReplyDeleteLots of hugs
xxx
oh my lord. Even some of the people I admire more say things like this. I just wish people would let well enough alone. I know they mean well but I can't hear it right, I just can't. and of course my mind always twists it into something else like "well you just look plain FAT"
ReplyDeletethanks for voicing your frustration about this. captured my thoughts in a nutshell.
Hello sweetie! I found your blog on CCKs blogroll - pleased to "meet" you! I'm so glad I dropped by, not only because your blog is so pretty but also becasue I can relate to you completely. I'm glad to say that I have left many years of sadness and deprivation behind me. I'm moving forward but, like you, the words, "You look well" have the power to stop me in my tracks. I'm sending you lots of love xoxo
ReplyDeleteI'm right there with you ladies on this.
ReplyDeleteAnother one that gets me is when you eat a really large salad and someone goes "you're gonna eat ALL that?"
Yes I fucking am, piss off out of my face!
People need to keep it ZIPPED.
You're on my blogroll girlie :-) I'm looking forward to getting to know you more :-)
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear this. I agree that lots of those comments are things that you really don't want to hear. They sound really insensitive by absolutely any standard!
ReplyDeleteYour blog is sooo sooo pretty!
@thequirkykitchen
ReplyDeleteThank you so much chicky! I have returned the favour and can't wait to read your bloggy.
xxx
@mindrunningwild
ReplyDeleteI am so pleased I reached out to you guys as a lot of people seem to relate. Hope you're okay chicka xxx
@Leanne@Coffeeandclaptrap
ReplyDeleteOH MY GEE! I KNOW!
@Kezzie
ReplyDeleteTell me about it!
Thank you honey :)