Saturday 10 July 2010

Exhaustion



This is my wonderful friend Julie! She recently performed at the Glasgow Mela Festival with Spinal Chord It was a lovely day for the event in Kelvingrove Park and Julie looked and did a fantastic job at twirling and spinning through the air. A true little butterfly! 

In other news...  my graduation was on Wednesday (photos to follow). This whole graduating thing has thrown me as its a case of what now? What do I do? Where am I going? What should I be doing? What do people think of me? That last one is probably the stickler for me as I am constantly worried about being judged and thinking what other people think when really why should it matter! I do have some ideas of what I'll be doing over the next year but right now I am just not in a place to think about way off into the future. I have been advised to focus on my health right now and that sounds simple!  Putting plan into action feel like climbing a mountain... with eight bottles of diet pepsi in my bag. Hopefully things will become easier as I am not liking this sticky pudding I'm stuck in...

I have been over exerting myself as per usual running, swimming, going to too many classes and walking everywhere. I just feel compelled to be doing something all of the time and if I am sitting for more than a half hour I feel lazy. I know that these are not rational thoughts and because I am being consumed by my eating disorder its distorting everything and I need to try to fight these feelings as its sending me further into a place I don't want or need to be. I know how to turn things around and I talk about how I will but actually doing it is a whole other story. I need to give myself a firm kick up the bee hind! La. If it were that easy.

Its now time for midnight hi lights followed by some much needed Zzzz's

B

2 comments:

  1. Once again, congrats on graduating. It's huge accomplishment! :) As for figuring out what to do next, sit back and look at all your options. Maybe even write down pros and cons of various options. Once you see what is out there for you now, I'm sure it will come to you what you want to do and you will do awesome in whatever it is you choose.

    As for your health, it is so important to get and be healthy. Where's the fun in life when you have goals and accomplishments and you can't even enjoy them? Good luck and positivity your way! :)

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  2. Thank you so much Abbey I know you're right.

    I hope you're well & thanks again :)

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