Saturday, 10 April 2010


I have a few important decisions to make after my latest appointment... basically I have been advised to go in patient again as my exercise regime is slightly out of control & my intake hasn't increased. I don't want to leave my surroundings and my cat so I really think I need to use this to be a bit more open about how things really are.

I pay way too much attention to what people say and take things to heart like a total baba. The most recent ones on my appearance have greatly upset me and feel like I am being judged or something? Having maintained a low weight for a while I guess people are used to seeing me therefore I am petrified to gain weight in fear of what people will say or think I'm a terrible person for giving in. It sounds ridiculous but I feel like I'd be failing and I would hate to be a failure. My eating disorder and exercise addiction has completely consumed my life and isn't healthy by any standard. Yet I feel like I'm not as bad as other people with the same/similar problem and don't need the help and eventually it will be okay. I paste on my brave face, smile, blush and try to pretend that everything really isn't that difficult or hard. However inside I am struggling and feel so ambivalent about what I should do.

How does one deal with remarks on weight etc? looking 'well' is the one I find hardest to take on board which is silly but I'm being such a girl right now.

Photo happy cat meow posts soon


  1. I find any weight related comment hard to take, so cant advise you there...
    I wish I knew what to say, I really do xxx

  2. hello :)
    I stumbled here from somewhere, and, I read the above, too. Right down to hearing you look 'well' being the hardest comment to take. Being told 'well' is always the worst, and nor do I have a clue why. I never know how to respond :/
    wishing you good things :)

  3. On the other side of the scale, being overweight and being unable to lose it, i get the same kind of thing. If they say you don't look well, say "well thats a shame, because i FEEL well" then smile at them and ask how their life is going. Most people will be so uncomfortable with you actually calling them out on the matter that they will drop the conversation they were going to have.